G's Thought For The Day...

I used to wake up in the morning and wonder; "What am I doing today"? Now I get up and wonder "What WON'T I do today"!

National Coming Out Day, 2011 Photo Op...Los Angeles And Other Info

Hey y'all,

Calling all LA girls & guys. as you may know National Coming Out Day is Tuesday, Oct 11. As part of the social media explosion that will happen on that day, the LA Gay & Lesbian Center is inviting people to come to the Center (1625 Schrader) on Monday, Oct 10 at 1 p.m. and help us form a human configuration of the word #OUT, which will be photographed from above and used for our NCOD social media campaign. Whether you are LGBT or an ally, this is going to be a fun way to show support, So I hope to see you there!!

RSVP at the link below and PLEASE spread the word!
http://bit.ly/qnHRkB

The Center is also part of a grassroots effort to make NCOD 2011 the best ever! PLEASE check out this Facebook page for details on how you can be part of this momentous occasion!

Two Years Old

Yesterday was the two year anniversary of my moving to Los Angeles and FINALLY beginning my life as my TRUE self. It was a truly day for celebration, which I did and then some! It's been such an amazing period of growth and re-affirming wonderment that I still sometimes just have to sit back and smile in disbelief at how beautiful life has become.

It wasn't that long ago that I was miserable and basically a shut in over my inability to be who I knew I really was. Through a mix of frustration, support and blind faith, I loaded up a u-haul, made my way down the coast and made Gina my reality. My world turned upside down. I went from an unemployed, apathetic invisible being, to a thriving, caring soul that is happily employed at a job that is making a difference in the LGBT community and I have an incredible network of love and support that I sometimes feel guilty over it all.

The last two years have been THE most wondrous of my entire life. The love and support I received from family and friends has been nothing short of remarkable. Their new found respect and awe over my transition and rebound from the shell of a human being I used to be is called inspirational to some. I just look at it as self-preservation, but I relish being able to enlighten people that transgender people aren't freaks or sexual deviants. All we want is to live productive, and most of all HAPPY lives.

I've finally gotten to the point in my life that I can truly look at the mirror and smile. Not only at my physical reflection, but what I've accomplished in my heart& soul. If there is hint of regret, it's that my beloved parents didn't make it to see their child finally reach absolute bliss, but I know they are looking down and so proud of their baby!

I've received some many wonderful well-wishes from friends and family that have truly touched my very soul. One in particular was so awesome to me that I had to share it. So to all my wonderful friends and family...THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT. I will try every day of my life to exude and share the love you have shown me. This hat toss is for you...


And to my pal CiCi, thanks for the new theme song, babe!

With friends like you, it looks like I really did make it after all!!!

I did it MY WAY!

Never forget the soundtrack of your life. Especially the tracks that come from a place where you were completely lost! Those are the ones that can now be celebrated!

This got me through a lot of bad days...

My "Love" Letter to Linda Harvey

I came across some rather unfortunate comments by Linda Harvey, member of the unenlightened party, tonight. After reading this article, I felt compelled to say "Hi" to her.

Here is the article I read...

Anti-Gay Christian Right-Wing Activist Says ‘There’s No Proof’ LGBT People Exist
By Stephen D. Foster Jr.


Linda Harvey, the founder of Mission America, says that LGBT people don’t exist. She made the comments during her weekend broadcast while she was attacking the Gay, Lesbian, And Straight Education Network.

Harvey was particularly perturbed by the GLSEN Sports Program which works towards “creating and maintaining an athletic and physical education climate that is based on the core principles of respect, safety and equal access for all students, teachers and coaches regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity/expression.”

Harvey believes there is no need for such a program because according to her, there is no proof that LGBT people exist.

Harvey: “There’s one big fact that’s not backed up. There is no proof that there’s ever anything like a gay, lesbian or bisexual or transgendered child, or teen or human. One of the other things you’re gonna see as I mentioned is a big campaign GLSEN’s gonna roll out this year calling for ‘respect,’ respect! Not just for people, but for homosexual lifestyle. The PR campaign to hold up gay as a good thing: the lifestyle, not the person, because there are no such humans.”

Mission America’s major area of focus is homosexuality from a conservative Christian viewpoint, particularly as it relates to American youth. It also opposes the influence of Pagan and feminist spirituality, and provides a range of apologetics for Christianity.

Linda Harvey is hateful and in denial. There are many LGBT people in the public eye who are living proof that gay people exist like Rachel Maddow, Barney Frank, and Ellen DeGeneres, just to name a few. If you are part of the LGBT community, feel free to contact Harvey and her organization to let them know that you exist.

Mission America
P.O. Box 21836
Columbus, OH 43221-0836.
webmaster@missionamerica.com
www.missionamerica.com

Here is my "love note" to Ms. Sunshine...

Dear Ms. Harvey,

As a healthy, productive and happily EMPLOYED Transgender Woman, I'd like to thank you for your ignorance and unenlightenment. It's your brand of insane and hateful rhetoric that only emboldens our cause and presence. I will not allow myself to fall any further into your trap of hatred and misunderstanding. Instead, I wish you and yours nothing but peace, and hope that someday you can experience the same kind of happiness and bliss that I have. Oh, and just so you know, YES; I ABSOLUTELY, 1,000% do exist, as do you and yours, and I hope someday will see your way to being a part of a world where understanding and compassion, not hatred and ugliness reign.

Most respectfully,

Gina Bigham
Los Angeles, CA

Zihuatanejo

I've always adored the movie "The Shawshank Redemption". From the first time I saw that film, I've felt a connection with Andy Dufresne, but I could never quite pinpoint what it was about that character that drew me to him. As I watched the movie for the 100th or so time recently, I had quite the epiphany and finally understood why I was so enthralled with Andy and his unrelenting devotion to hope.

In the scene below, Andy and Red are having a very deep conversation. I can't believe it took me this long to figure it out, but it dawned on me that this conversation was very similar to discussions I had had with myself many, many times before, as I struggled with my transition.



I realized that Andy is me, the me I am today. The wise, bright-eyed optimist that always sees hope and goodness, even in the face of the deepest despair. Someone that was able to escape and never let anything or anyone ever again keep me locked away from my dreams, my goals, my Zihuatanejo.

Red, on the other hand, was completely how I used to be...hopeless and imprisoned by fear. Scared, negative, and a total pessimist through and through. It wasn't until my Shawshank revelation that I realized how much like Red I was and how; like Red, once I opened my heart and my mind to my own Andy-like spirit and inspiration that without even really realizing it, I had done it. I had become the living, breathing epitome of "the phrase". That so simple to say, yet oh so very difficult to put into practice phrase..."Get busy livin' or get busy dyin'".

We all dream about being able to live OUR own lives, OUR own way. We'd love to be able to abandon our inhibitions, our fears and stop listening to that meddlesome little voice in our heads that says over and over, "Oh, there is no way you can do that". That voice; that fear keeps us locked in our own Shawshank. We're imprisoned by the fear of not being able to "make it on the outside". We basically become "institutionalized", like Red was, like I once was. Clinging to some bullshit commitment to self-imposed mediocrity. Thinking that I was somehow doing the right thing by just towing the line. Hearing over and over in my head that this is how it is, because Warden Fear says so. Because this is how all the other inmates are.

The scene below symbolizes where it finally happened for me. Where hope won out and where Gina finally convinced Sean to be true to thy self, to "come a little further" and realize that "hope and being true to myself was a good thing, the best of things; and no good thing ever dies." This is when the two halves of my soul were melded into one. This is when I escaped and became ME.

Vidivodo.com : the shawshank redemption - final scene Etiket: movie

**Hit play and then by click the yellow "X" at the top right, to skip the ad**

Red's soliloquy on his enlightenment of hope shows that with an open heart and a willingness to throw caution to the wind, even the most cynical and hopeless of us can find ourselves finally too busy LIVING. It took Andy 20 years of digging at that wall, and what did he get for his patience, determination and HOPE? He broke free of his shackles and oppressors forever.

I'm living proof that hope is indeed a wonderful thing. Your own Zihuatanejo is out there waiting for YOU. Just know that you may have to crawl through a river of shit to get there, but it's so amazing how clean you will come out on the other side.

"Get busy livin' or get busy dyin'. That's goddamn right!"

Amazing article from an unlikely ally

This is an article I found today during my daily work searches of LGBT media. It's such a wonderfully uplifting piece it just had to be shared! It would be fab if you all could share this with as many people as you can, as well because it's that damn good, and that damn profound. It's actually even more amazing when you see who wrote the article. Seeing who the author is; is a prime example of how stereotyping by group is an awful, awful thing. I'll leave the big reveal for the end of the piece, so happy reading!

Trans-Stonewall: Chaz opens the door
By Kathy Baldock

Forty years ago, the LGBT communities tumbled out of the closet at Stonewall, never to go back in again.

Stonewall conveniently produced a replacement for the now-gone communists; after all, nothing unites people like a good ol’ fashioned enemy!

Gay people became the new devil to be protected against. “Hide your kids, your church doors, your family values—here come the gays.” And, it worked. For a time.

Politicians, preachers and conservative groups all found that by building a storyline of the “radical gay agenda,” more people huddled together in fear and supportive wallets popped open.

Small enough in number (only about 5 percent of the population), the gay, lesbian and bisexual communities became an easy target with benefits. But, dang it, they are no longer co-operating as child recruiters, family destroyers and Bible burners. We are starting to realize they are born gay, they love their partners and families and they can be Jesus followers.

Who, oh who shall be the next “enemy” in historical parade of foes: slaves, Nazis, Communists, gays . . . oh, there, looming on the horizon, there they are: the transgender community.

Mark my word on this, it is happening. The reactions to Chaz Bono dancing across a stage on “Dancing With the Stars” with a beautiful woman in his arms will clearly reveal the next wave of brewing hatred from politicians, preachers and conservative groups.

A familiar repeat of an old pattern about gays and lesbians but now targeting the trans-community is already emerging:

* Set the stage with fear and dispel the fact that transfolks are actually people. Reduce them to “freaks”.

* Talk about their sexual confusion, a lot.

* Find many professionals that will sound smart (even though every professional medical organization will have discounted those “experts”) and cite obscure studies with forty year old data.

* Cite and talk about other variations of body “mutilation” like people who cut their arms and legs off. Equate that to sex reassignment surgery (SRS).

* Manipulate statistics mixing gay and lesbian issues, which are about sexual orientation, with gender identity issues. So intertwine the two issues that people stay confused and uninformed.

* Find some trans-people that were not properly guided in the process and transform them into poster children for the cause. They will tell us that they never should have transitioned. Make videos and flyers about them and push them out through Family Research Council, Focus on the Family, Americans for Truth, the Liberty Council, NARTH and the up and coming brigadier general of the anti-trans parade, Michael Brown of the Coalition of Conscience.

* Tell us about the rare situations and kinkiest situations as if they are the norm. And then, tell us again, and again.

* Tell us that transgender people are confusing our children so that our kids are now living in daily fear and questioning of “am I a boy?”, “am I a girl?” Warn us this will be part of the “recruitment of our children” during their vulnerable years.

* Make us fearful of the society-wide blending of gender and role confusion that is inevitable. The family will disintegrate in a downward spirally of our sexual moral compass.

* Remind us that trans-community is well organized with an “agenda” and if they get their rights to love and marry, pedophiles will soon be demanding their rights too.

* And, with every threat and fear-based “fact” include what the what the Bible clearly says (to you) about transgender people. Make it sound really loving. Tell us you are only speaking up because you love truth and the transgender community.

Game on

Transgender people are beginning to stand up publicly and join churches; they are becoming business and governmental leaders and are no longer conveniently hiding. They are a very small percentage of the population (again, a good target) being only about .25% to 1%. Insignificant? Maybe in a room of fifty people, but in the US, that means at least 900, 000 people. That is not a toss away number.

If you do not understand the transgender issue, then please, get some understanding so that you no longer say stupid and offensive things. Gender Dysphoria Organization is a good start or even my own simple post “Can Sized 14 Heels Keep You Out of Heaven?” from a Biblical point of view. Simply:

* Gender and sex are NOT the same. Gender is what your brain says you are; sex is what your body says you are. It is a common childhood fantasy of trans-people to go to sleep and wake up the next day with brain and body matching. You can’t “pray the brain chemistry away” and, you surely can’t “pray the penis away”.

* They know between 5 and 8 that they are different yet they do not have the language to identify the difference. It is not “sexual” in context, it is a “knowing”.

* Sexual reassignment surgery (SRS) is not “self mutilation”, come on. No one is allowed to undergo this process in the US without long, prescribed medical and psychological counseling. It is carefully monitored.

* The pronouns and nouns used to refer to transgender people are the ones with which they identify themselves no matter where they are in the process. Intentionally calling a transman by “she” and “her” is intensely offensive and incredibly mean spirited.

As the trans-community is bravely raising its
head and stepping out publicly, they are challenging society’s definition of gender and it will not be comfortable on either side. This
highly marginalized group is now in their own “Stonewall” period.

“We are here, we are valuable, and we too are children of God.”

Chaz dancing across a stage will be too much
for some people and it will add to the already brewing rumblings of “oh no you don’t.”

Be better than that. Don’t add obstacles to the already difficult road laid before trans-men and trans-women. They have the highest attempted suicide rate in the US. The highest unemployment rate. The highest rate of employment and housing discrimination. They want what we all do: dignity and respect. Not transgender rights. Just equal rights.

Someone voiced a valid comment to me when I suggested the onus be upon her/you to get informed about this small minority. Genia said:

"HOW are those of us who are NOT members of the T community supposed to educate ourselves on issues that affect members of the T community when so many members of the T community have varying opinions and ideas on what it means to be transgender? We are often met with responses like “it is up to YOU to get educated” when we ask questions or when we ask for clarification."

So how do we go about gaining practical, relational knowledge when the likelihood is that most of us probably don’t know any transgender people? Transgender people, for the most part, are masters at suppressing who they are to survive. They invent ways to keep their identity hidden just to stay alive sometimes.

If intimacy in relationship means uncovering that, they need to feel safe. If you are a person that already indicates discomfort with the gay, lesbian and bisexual community, you would not be a safe or approachable person.

Good question, Genia. I learned this concept in my own relationship with my first very close lesbian friend, Netto. She did not tell me for a year that she was gay. It took her that long to assess me as “safe” and “trustworthy”and that was the beginning of my understanding and empathy for her and the LGBT community at large. When people feel safe, they will be more open and intimate. And thus, begins the process of mutual trust.

Until then, practical knowledge can be an entrée to conquering ignorant thinking about transgender people. The lies and misinformation I hear people babble about this group is maddening. When I started to understand gender dysphoria, oh my, did the trans-friend flood gates open! I was seen to be safe, compassionate and understanding and now, my friend-garden is filled with the most interesting of people that do not fit into my neighbor’s pink and blue flower box. I am the blessed one.

And to the transgender people reading this, forgive us for being uninformed and fearful. The encouragement to you is that five years ago, I too discounted you. I walked to the center and so did the very gracious Cecilia. Actually, she walked most of the way and I stumbled onto her path. If you see that there is that “thing” in us that looks safe and you are confident, please help us understand you.

So, here is a final story with flesh.

Recently, I was traveling back to my home in Nevada from California with a transwoman friend of mine, Lisa. I live near Lake Tahoe and was intent that she should swim in Tahoe before she went back home.

“Make sure you bring a bathing suit with you,” I told her.

As a little boy at ten, he was self conscious about his naked chest. Something in his head told him to cover up. Not even knowing anything about the differences between boys and girls beyond “girls wore dresses, were smaller and had long hair”, he felt “exposed” and tried to hide his chest when he swam. Gym class was a nightmare when the teams would break into “skins” and “shirts”. If he were on the topless “skins” team, it was intensely embarrassing. He purposefully missed swim team group photos; this was not a “body image” issue, it was a “deep knowing”; the sight of his penis was “awkward,” like it did not belong.

I did not know any of this when I invited my friend Lisa to swim that evening in Lake Tahoe. It was the first time she had gone swimming since her SRS. She dove into the water looking gorgeous in her swimsuit and got out and walked comfortably back to our towels in front of a group of young men. She did not cover her chest, she was no longer ashamed. Her body matched her brain and the disconnected pieces were now melded. She also realized she was no longer covering up and it overwhelmed her as she told me her story. A simple swim for me was freedom to Lisa.

When Chaz hits the floor dancing on September 19 on “Dancing With the Stars,” he will be dancing for so many of you, publicly standing in the face of bias and bigotry that so many of you face.

We can attempt to force our binary pink/blue view on the .25 – 1% because they are messy to us and we need them to exist within our comfort zones. Or, we can try to be Jesus-people and accept others for who they are.

I imagine I serve a Wonderful Creator Who really is creative; in all this lovely complexity of humanity, He understands both gender and sex. Plenty of people are already plotting the next onslaught of bigotry directed at the transgender community.

Some people will react with scorn and “how dare he/she” comments. Try not to be in that prison with them. I say “Dance Chaz.” “Swim Lisa.” God loves you just the way you are.

* Note: Although the trans community was VERY present at Stonewall, they did not become the focus of the public backlash. We have ignored them until recently.

**Kathy Baldock, is a straight Evangelical Christian, working to repair the breach between the the church and the LGBT Christian community.**

You don't see a lot of straight Evangelical Christian's going to bat for the LGBT community, so for that may I say...bravo and THANK YOU, Kathy!! You are truly an inspiration!

Show your support for Chaz!

Show your support for our favorite "star" and give Chaz your support and good wishes! Let your voice be heard on twitter and let's get #ProBono trending WORLDWIDE!

http://www.glaad.org/probono

Tell Dr. Keith Ablow where to go!

Fox's resident quack, "Dr" Keith Ablow, famous for his flip out over the J Crew ad where a woman had painted her 5 year old son's toenails pink, is espousing more transphobic rhetoric, this time aimed at Chaz Bono's inclusion on Dancing With The Stars. "Dr" Ablow claims Chaz's presence on the show will influence "tomboyish girls" or "less stereotypically 'masculine' boys" to believe they are transgender. He also states that the message Bono is trying to send is "very nearly insane. It's a psychologically destructive myth and can erode our children's evolving senses of self."

This man should NOT be allowed to spread this vile kind of hated and misinformation. You would hope that the role of a "psychiatrist" would be to help a person be as mentally strong and as vibrant as they can be, not spout biased, hurtful and potentially deadly nutjobbery. It's people like him and his suppressive, demented teachings that will erode our children's sense of self, because if it were up to him, if that sense of self wasn't "normal" like his, it should just be stuffed deep down into the soul and left to fester until it manifests itself in ways harmful to both the the person in question, and people around them. He is such a detriment to his profession. If I had kids, I'd surely let them watch Chaz Bono try to dance before I let them listen to one hateful word this man had to say.

You can tell "Dr" Ablow he is dead wrong by signing this petition organized by the Human Rights Campaign. PLEASE sign and let it be known that transphobia and misinformation have no place on public airwaves.

Tell "Dr" Ablow where to go!

Transgender equal rights: Transgendered people deserve same rights that others enjoy - OrlandoSentinel.com

This is a really great article by David Moran from the Orlando Sentinel. It gives some pretty sobering numbers, but we already knew that, didn't we? I'd like to thank and applaud David for his candor and support! The more and more people like David who become enlightened to the REAL plight of Transgender people makes me believe that WE SHALL OVERCOME this climate of hate & violence and be able to live productive, happy lives!!

New Voices: Transgendered people deserve same rights that others enjoy
By David Moran | Special to the Sentinel
12:00 a.m. EDT, August 27, 2011

A friend of mine recently told me that she was kicked out of a bar in Kissimmee for being transgendered.

She had ordered a drink and was waiting for her friends to arrive when three male bar-staff members confronted her. They accused her of being a man. She was told she was not welcome there and was escorted out.

My friend thinks the bouncer at the front door suspected she was transgendered after looking at her identification, and that he notified the bar staff. My friend was not disorderly, violent or causing a scene. She was simply a paying customer out for drinks with friends, minding her own business.

I am appalled that my friend would be kicked out of a bar simply for being transgendered. Should all diabetics or people with high blood pressure be thrown out of bars, too? Her transition from male to female is to accommodate a medical condition, just like insulin or blood-pressure medicine are methods of treatment.

What kind of example does this set for youth? That it is OK to bully people and treat certain individuals like second-class citizens because they are different?

The Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network found in its 2009 National School Climate Survey that nearly nine out of 10 lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered students experienced harassment at school in the past year, and nearly two-thirds felt unsafe because of their sexual orientation. We are already breeding fear and ignorance in our schools.

This incident at the Kissimmee bar is more evidence of an ongoing, nationwide transphobia epidemic. According to the National Center for Transgender Equality and the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force, transgendered people face well-documented and unconscionable levels of hate violence as well as workplace, housing and health-care discrimination.

Twenty-six percent of transgendered people have been fired because of their gender identities; 19 percent of transgendered people have been homeless because of their gender identities; 15 percent of transgendered people have incomes below the poverty level.

Transgendered people of color are even more profoundly impacted, with 28 percent of Latino transgendered people and 35 percent of black transgendered people living in poverty.

The Human Rights Campaign estimates that one out of every 1,000 homicides in the United States is an anti-transgender hate-based crime.

The 2010 National Transgender Discrimination Survey found that 41 percent of respondents reported attempting suicide compared with 1.6 percent of the general population.

Transgendered individuals are human beings with basic rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness like everyone else. I once was ignorant toward the transgender community, but I now am becoming educated on the issues.

Orlando has certainly made strides with the anti-discrimination and human-rights ordinances that aim to protect residents from discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity and expression.

Central Florida is also fortunate to have community organizations like the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Community Center, the Metropolitan Business Association, and the Transgender Women's Business Council, which continue to improve the visibility of transgender issues.

The Zebra Coalition is also working to provide services for transgendered youth.

I admire and respect members of the transgender community for having the courage to be true to themselves, in spite of such unnecessary adversity. I am proud to be an ally and an advocate, and I challenge others to educate themselves and do the same.

Email submissions of about 600 words to newvoices@orlandosentinel.com. Include a high-resolution JPEG image of yourself.

David Moran, 27, of Orlando is pursuing an Emerging Media Master of Fine Arts degree at the University of Central Florida.


Transgender equal rights: Transgendered people deserve same rights that others enjoy - OrlandoSentinel.com